Sunday, October 19, 2008

Random thoughts about random things

One of the things I'm learning while dealing with a serious illness, a life-threatening condition is to limit my contact with certain people. There are people who are helpful and supportive and these are people I want to keep close. There are people who want to make my condition about them somehow and want me to help and support them as they deal with my illness. I don't have the energy for that. There are people who want to offer opinions on what I should do or how I should behave. If opinions can be offered in love without attacking me, then I want to hear them. Maintaining relationships requires a lot of energy. My stores are limited so I have to make careful choices. Being a relative is not an automatic in either. 

I've been thinking about the generations of Southern women I grew up knowing. The women who helped form and shape me. Women who could eat bar-b-q ribs with a knife and fork while wearing white gloves and remain spotless. Women who could speak truth to power. I loved them and I miss them. I'm also one of them and that makes me proud. Yes, my silver pattern was picked out at birth, I know all the rules of proper etiquette, I know what is appropriate though I don't always write thank you notes (mother, forgive me.) 

I was listening to NPR and heard a gentleman talking about buying a new computer. When he asked Mac folk about Macs they told him all the wonderful things about their computer. When he asked PC folk about PCs they told him all the things wrong with Macs. This presidential election is similar. Democrats can tell you all the wonderful things about Obama and his plans for the nation. Republicans can only tell you what is wrong with Obama. 




3 comments:

Grandmère Mimi said...

There are people who want to make my condition about them somehow and want me to help and support them as they deal with my illness. I don't have the energy for that.

Oh yes, Roseann. That made me smile. I know. No matter that YOU face serious surgery and a complicated aftermath, it must be about how hard it is for THEM. I would put them in the category of toxic friends, at least temporarily.

Behave as you must behave. No one is in your exact situation, so how would they know how you should behave? If you feel that you must choose your company carefully now, then do that. You need folks who will uplift you and encourage you, but not with bland assurances that everything is sure to be just fine.

I offer you my love and my prayers, which is about all I can do from a distance. May God be with you and your doctors tomorrow. May God pour forth her/his grace and love in great abundance upon you and those who love you. May God's presence fill your minds and hearts with peace.

Being Peace said...

Thank you Mimi. Your love and prayers are great gifts to me.

Love to you and our new President! Roseann

Tracie the Red said...

Oooh, I love your THAT ONE avatar! Too cute!