Thursday, August 28, 2008

I smell smoke

Am I burning bridges with my brother and nephew? Did I strike the match? Was there a bridge there to burn?

I don't know. My brother thinks I should love and support his children no matter what. Love them, yes...I do and will. Support anything they choose? Support a decision to align with the Taliban of America? No. I can't and won't.

So where does that leave me? My spiritual mentor would say, "love them out of it." My understanding of ACIM says, "forgive them, it isn't real anyway." My heart says, "love them and stay true to yourself."

I feel like my own little personal drama that is reflected on a much larger scale in the Episcopal Church is a big life lesson for me. How do I love in this situation? What is the loving thing to do?


StLouisJohn said...

How do I love in this situation? What is the loving thing to do?

In other words, how do we Live the Gospel?

This is one I grapple with as well. Recently, I sent an email asking about the well being of someone. That person does not get how much his rash action hurt me and some others. I think it's a start in the direction towards what you speak of.

In your own case, it's a toughie, that's for sure. What comes to mind (YMMV) is to be Present in their lives. By that, I mean let your presence be known. As a sort of living conscience if you will. Remain interested in their lives, ask how "University" is going -- but if the conversation veers into fundy-land, ever so gently steer it away. But stay visible in their lives, so they'll think a bit before just falling into lock step.

Just my thoughts.

Hugs, love and prayer to you!


suzanne said...

Oh, relatives!! It's funny how families can go their separate ways. But John is right. You love them where they are. Sometime til it hurts, you, not them.

My younger brother is much like yours, and he has become a person I don't know. Very fundamental, so much so he and a small group from his church broke away from the home church, because...well I'm not sure because he hasn't spoken to me about it. He is quick to tell me I belong to a pseudo-catholic church, but I was happy to explain to him that we don't have a Pope nor do we have the guilt. AND *Everyone* is welcome at the table.

His daughter is my God-child. Oh that happened when they attended the Catholic church, and his son, well he's perfect. ( I'd never tell him to his face), but there are sexuality issues that have confounded my little bro and sister-in law. and I haven't learned that from them either.

So John, thank you for reminding me about Living the Gospel.

Roseann, Good luck with the tree bark diet. Actually you might begin to feel better while on it, I did.